Space Truckers
Space Truckers (1996)
Image From IMDB
Tywin Lannister dressed as a cybernetic space Nazi with an electric wang (his words, not mine) threatening to rape Vincent Chase’s scantily clad publicist who appeared permanently on heat was not something I expected in any movie, but fortunately this one was directed by the great Stuart Gordon so it’s exactly what I got. If there’s a fucked up bizarre scene to be had, he will find a way to make it happen, and I love him for it.
Also… that whole insane sequence finished with Dennis Hopper uttering the line “For a son of a bitch gimp rapist murderer, he’s kinda ok.” There’s an extra star for the movie right there.
Space Truckers is just weird. And by that, I mean every single thing about it is weird. The plot. The performances (and casting for that matter). The special effects. The music. The colour palette. Even the distribution of the movie is unlike any other i’ve heard of.
The A to B plot revolves around Dennis Hopper, Debi Mazar, and the most ridiculous Stephen Dorff performance ever (and that’s saying something) unwittingly taking a job delivering killer robots to Earth. On the way there they have to tackle over zealous KFC gangsters, black asteroids, and space pirates… along with the unkillable robots.
The humour through-out is dark and cruel, mixed in with some toilet and juvenile humour, but also some solid gold like Charles Dance having performance issues when his electric wang won’t start. (he’s literally pulling a cord like its an onboard motor, and its amazing).
I’m certain a lot of the budget must have gone to Hopper as the special effects ranged from possibly actual Lego, to typical 90’s CGI, while the makeup effects where either intentionally funny, or really really really really bad. Either way, I loved them.
Dennis Hopper was Dennis Hopper, but in a low budget (despite the 25mil budget) space opera. Debi Mazar was eye-fucking everything in sight while in her bra for half the movie. And Stephen Dorff made me laugh with nearly ever line of dialogue he had and i’m pretty certain none of it was intentional. I don’t think he had a clue what was going on, and I can’t blame the guy.
The movie was just nuts. In lesser hands it would have been a forgettable mess, but Stuart Gordon isn’t lesser hands. No matter the movie, he’ll give you something. Space Truckers is absolutely wacky. It’s stupid (borderline retarded) has very little heart despite trying, and could probably be considered pretty damn offensive by modern standards, but I had so much fun with it. I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone other than people I know will love it, but if you’re a Stuart Gordon fan and you haven’t seen it, give it a watch.
